The exhaustion is real for me right now but I wanted to share a few things while they were fresh on my mind. We often say that our biological children here with us do ministry WITH us, that we do ministry as a family, but y'all don't always get a clear picture of that. Our older kids aren't a fan of the camera so they aren't shown doing ministry that often. The last several days have been complete "disorder", as in not our normal at all.
Immediately upon realizing that I was planning Wayne's funeral I knew I wanted Karson to make Wayne's box that he would be buried in. Almost all of the caskets here are designed in ways I don't like. They are "decked" out with gold colored things (crosses, roses, RIP signs). I hate the way most of them look and I didn't want something like that for Wayne at all. I asked Karson to make a beautifully simple box for Wayne and he agreed. He wasn't a huge fan of the idea, because this kind of stuff is hard, but he did it and it turned out just perfect. Next I went to Caitie and asked her to crochet a blanket and a cover for the thin mat he would lay on. She of course agreed and got started. It was not easy considering the circumstances and the time crunch, but she did a beautiful job and is happy she was able to make those items. Then for the next several days Caitie and Karson held down the home while we ran countless errands, made way too many decisions and ended each day with what felt like a bigger "to do" list than the day before.
Joy and Violet went to town with us a couple of days and helped me make decisions and pick things out. There are so many details to a funeral and we needed to add some nicer clothes for our kids. Joy and Brendan helped me fold 600 obituaries that we had printed. Aspen and Reed asked many questions and told me often that they love and miss Wayne. The girls (Caitie, Joy, Violet and Aspen) worked together to help make sure everyone had a nice-ish outfit and shoes to wear the funeral. Joy is in the church choir so she sang multiple songs at Wayne's funeral despite crying in-between songs.
Jeff did an amazing job talking about our love for Wayne. Wayne will always be our sweet, precious baby boy and while his life was short he had an impact on many here in Kenya and in America. I don't know how Jeff does it, but he does an amazing job at tying in, presenting, preaching and/or teaching the Gospel. I'm so thankful for his gift and leadership in this area. Yesterday was no different, he taught from 2 Samuel 12:15-23 and did an amazing job.
Overall, yesterday was beautiful. This whole experience has shown me that even though sometimes I feel like our biological family unit isn't as strong as it was, that we in fact do still have it. Missions is hard, there is a constant pull and struggle of feeling like you're doing too much, yet not doing enough. Feeling like you have to let one group down to meet another group's needs. Wanting to do more in all areas, yet not having enough hours in the day. It is a balance of needs vs wants and time and resources vs reality.
Thank you for your prayers during this crazy difficult time. We have a busy rest of the week, with a teacher's meeting Friday, we are hosting a Sharon Bible School graduation on Saturday, church on Sunday and then school starts back on Monday. Maybe next week there will be a small break for me...maybe? Oh, and did I mention that I'm doing the AIP diet and haven't had any chocolate, coffee or sugar (other than what's in fruit) during this whole ordeal? 😂😂😂
And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.
Romans 8:28 ESV